It is Valentine’s Day again and love is in the air, never mind that the upcoming elections had to be scheduled for February 14th! Maybe the thinking is to encourage love in the Country!

As you might be considering what to buy for your partner for Valentine’s day or how to show your appreciation and love for your partner, here are some recommendations to help you as you shop.

Love should be an everyday thing really! Konga offers a variety of products across all budgets.

1. Getaway – Book a Hotel stay, without getting on a plane you can decide to take your spouse for a get away from the hustle and bustle, a night away from the kids just to relax and spend time with each other. Check out the Blowfish Hotel special, book a spa treatment or dinner for two. Shop the deal here at  Konga.com 

2. Greeting Cards – Show your love with some greeting cards with an African flair, from CaxtonAlile like “Nepa Or No Nepa, You Light Up My World! Happy Valentine’s Day” shop for more greeting cards here  

3. Chocolates – Give some chocolates like Ferrero Roche chocolate, flash from the past. Chocolates 

4. Flowers – Roses are always a great way to show your love, this is a crystal rose that can be engraved for your loved one. Buy it here 

5. Tablets – Tablets are here to stay and who does not love getting a new tablet. Shop here for an array of choices. The kids do not have to be left out as there is a kiddie tablet available.

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I met a young lady recently and as we got talking, I asked her what she majored in. When she responded,  I was like; What! … I had never heard of her course of study. That conversation got me thinking and so here are top 10 degrees that did not exist 10 years ago. I bet you’ve never heard of them either #wink

Nanotechnology

Technology never ceases to amaze me. The field of nanotechnology works with systems at the molecular level and can be applied across many different disciplines, including physics, engineering and chemistry. Most nanotechnology programs are at the graduate level, but several programs provide a background in nanotechnology studies, like bachelor’s program in nanosystems engineering at Louisiana Tech University.

Career opportunities: Nanotechnology career opportunities, exist in areas such as;

• Electronics/semiconductor industry
• Materials science including textiles, polymers, packaging, among others
• Auto and aerospace industries
• Biotechnology
• Environmental monitoring, control, and remediation
• Food science including quality control and packaging
• Forensics
• University and federal lab research
• Military and national security

U.S. salaries for nanotechnology engineering technicians range from $30,000 to $94,000 according to Recruiter.com with the average at $79,000.That’s a lot of dollars!

Computer Game Design

Almost every child loves playing video games. To give them what they want and also a source of income, parents could consider pointing them towards this path by encouraging them to major in computer game design. Computer game design programs were nearly nonexistent a decade ago, today more than 150 colleges offer programs and courses in game design.

Some programs, like the computer games development program at DePaul University, focus on the programming of games while others, like Michigan State University launched a Serious Game Design master’s degree program  for students with “a desire to create and study games which change the world.”

Career Opportunities: Video games are a $30 billion industry in the U.S., especially as more people play games on their mobile phones, according to Reuters. Game designers are an important part of a comprehensive team of designers and developers that coordinate the complex task of creating a new video game. As long as there are upgrades on phones and PCs there will be need for Game designers. According to payscale, the average pay for a Video Game Designer is $54,510 per year. 

 E-Business/E-Marketing

This field focuses on buying, selling and marketing items on the Internet and may also include communicating with customers, employees and business partners. Demand for employees in this field is expected to grow faster than average, according to U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics.

Degree programs in e-marketing are usually in universities’ business schools and are more common at the graduate level. Some schools, like the University of Akron, offer bachelor’s programs in e-marketing.

As of today, an E-Marketer can earn as high as $36,000 per year, according to Telemarketer

Technology Entrepreneurship:

This course is being offered at the Carnegie Mellon University and other universities around the world. Many of the world’s most recent and most successful ventures have stemmed from technology-centric concepts. Designed to “sharpen the students’ skills in identifying technology-based business opportunities,” this course teaches students how to approach entrepreneurship from a technologist’s perspective.

Career Opportunities:

In corporate settings, an entrepreneur that maintains their managerial and directorial responsibilities is often called a ‘chief executive officer’ (CEO) and are typically also simultaneously a board member. The annual average salary of such a position was $173,000 in May 2010.

Social Media & Virtual Communities: 

These days, we wouldn’t recommend starting a business without a solid social media marketing strategy. This course prepares students by teaching them how to integrate social media into a business context and tap communities in the most interactive way possible. This  is being offered at  Emory Univerisity Goizueta Business School.

The average salary for a Social media expert and Virtual community specialist per year is $50,000.

Forensic accounting

The need for Forensic Accountants has increased over the years due to the rise in corporate scandals. While it has existed for many years, forensic accounting is now the fastest-growing field of accounting. Forensic accountants are like money detectives – they investigate suspected financial mishandling and assist in legal matters. Forensic accountants must have a broad understanding of business practices beyond standard accounting skills.

A Forensic Accountant can earn as high as $60,000 per year.

Biotechnology

Biotechnology combines biology and technology to solve agricultural, food science and medical issues. It is an interdisciplinary field and is often combined with a business degree. Most biotechnology degrees are at the master’s level, yet bachelor’s degrees in biotechnology are starting to emerge as this field becomes more in demand.

Career paths include:  bioinformatics, biomedical engineering and biomedical engineering. A Biotechnologist in the US can earn an average of $71,000 per year.

Media & Social Psychology :
The course invites students to study social psychology in terms of mass media, and more specifically, as it relates to social influence. A big part of how we’re influenced today happens through social media.

The course explores the processes of self concept formation, the formation of judgments, explanations and expectations, along with an exploration of attitudes and behavior, and social identity embedded within the context of mass media influence, new media interactions and the social psychology of social networks. Media psychologists’ average salary as of 2011 was recorded to be $53,000 annually. Based on the region, field, and number of years in the profession, the figures could vary according to psychologyschool.

Robotics

As futuristic as it sounds, there’s been a demand for a robotics degree for quite some time. In 2007, the Worcester Polytechnic Institute offered the first bachelor’s degree program in robotics engineering.

As the name suggests, robotics is the study of the design, build and operation of robots.

Career Opportunities include; Welding, Installing safety systems, Programming and reprogramming robots,
Robot maintenance and repair e.t.c. A Robotics expert can earn as much as $71,000 per year.

Data Journalism and Investigative Reporting: 

Your ward will learn how to find useful documents and other sources of data, extract meaningful information from large data sets, prepare data for public use, and make it possible for consumers of the news to interact with the data. They will also learn how to use data to perform investigative journalism.

The salary scale for a Data / Investigative Journalism expert ranges from $48,000 – $56,000 per year.

The list is endless but, these are the top 10 degrees that didn’t exist 10 years ago. Keep encouraging your children to explore new areas….

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Our recipe for this week will take us to the Middle East from our Kitchen. The recipe this week is how to make a Shawarma, which is among the most popular Middle Eastern delicacies and largely eaten in Nigeria. This delicacy is mouth watering and stirs up euphoric emotions when mentioned.

Shawarma is an excellent source of proteins, potassium, vitamin A, sodium, vitamin B6, iron, vitamin C, magnesium, thiamine, calcium, niacin, iron and dietary fiber. It also contains some amounts of cholesterol, fats, carbohydrates, and sugar. When you eat Shawarma, you know you are eating healthy.

If you follow these steps, you will notice that it is as simple as ABC even though you have thought it was very difficult to make before now. 

Ingredients

• 2 Chicken breasts (deboned)
• 2 Chicken laps (deboned) – (Beef can be used in place of chicken)
• 6 SharwaRma bread (pita/ flour or wheat tortilla wraps)
• 1 small sized cabbage
• 3 medium sized carrots
• 1 large cucumber
• 2 big fresh tomatoes
• 1 medium sized onions
• Ketchup
• Mayonnaise or salad cream
• 2 tablespoon vegetable/olive
• 1 teaspoon thyme
• 2 teaspoon curry
• 2 teaspoon minced onions
• 1 teaspoon garlic powder
• 1 large stock cube(crushed into powder)
• Half a teaspoon of black pepper
• Chilli pepper(optional)
• Salt to taste

Method

• Wash and cut the vegetables into thin strips (i.e. the cabbage, carrots) cut the cucumber in circles and set aside,
• Cut the chicken or beef into thin strips and set aside,
• Place the chicken or beef strips in a bowl and add the thyme, curry, minced onions, garlic, stock cube and black pepper. Mix thoroughly until well incorporated then cover and keep in the fridge for 2 or more hours. The longer the chicken or beef stays in the fridge to marinate the better it tastes.
• Heat up a tablespoon of oil in a pan and add the chicken or beef with a little salt depending on your taste. Stir fry until it is juicy and brown. Scoop into a plate and set aside.
• Mix some mayonnaise/salad cream and ketchup together
• Spread the mayonnaise and ketchup mixture on the shawarma bread and fill it with the sliced vegetables and the meat on one end and sprinkle with some chilli pepper (optional).
• Fold the bread, tuck in the edge and roll to form a sharwarma wrap.

Enjoy

N.B: for a healthy choice you can use a wheat tortilla or pita wraps. You can get them at any supermarket.

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Today I was catching up with my Aunty earlier this week, she recently had eye surgery which hadn’t totally exactly gone as planned. Everything that could go wrong had gone wrong.. She was belonged to the 1% that have extreme reactions to the surgery. Thank God all is well now. I looked dismayed as she told me all that had happened. She said “You have to totally prepare your mind before you go under the knife, you just have to prepare yourself” I asked her if she was scared after all the complications (side note: she is an eye surgeon so she knows worst case scenarios). She looked at me and said “Tomi, nothing is certain in life, even with all I know I could not have predicted it would turn out like this, but you just have to be ready. I was ready and God did the rest”.

It randomly got me thinking about marriage…

How many people are truly going into marriage, this life long decision with the right attitude, knowledge and frame of mind? I am not saying that things will not come up, I am not saying being prepared paves the way for a perfect future either. What I am saying is being prepared in mind and spirit helps the journey. Someone once said in a gathering, that people put in more work for keeping their jobs and meeting targets than they do on their marriages. Sadly I find this to be true.

Preparation means actively planning and equipping yourself for an unknown future. I do not mean to paint a perfect world or unrealistic expectations because one has “prepared”. However I do believe preparation makes a world of difference in marriage and I have broken down this marriage preparedness into three areas.

Know yourself

Before you can love any one, before you can sacrifice (yes marriage is a sacrifice) you have to know who you are and whose you are. Be brutally honest with yourself about your shortcomings, know your vices, work on your imperfections but celebrate your strengths. You can deceive everyone else but yourself.  In your alone time, truly assess what matters to you, what your values are and where you see yourself in the future. This helps you pick the right support system and ultimately the right spouse.

Know your partner

It is impossible to know another person completely but at least you can work at getting to know their heart. Is the person fundamentally kind, generous, good hearted? Does he/she have a forgiving spirit? How does he interact with family and friends? Figure out what is important to you in a partner and be honest with yourself to check this when you meet people or start dating. Don’t compromise beyond the yardstick you have set for yourself.

Most importantly know God’s promise for you both

God ordained marriage, he planned it and he never makes mistakes. Human beings make mistakes. It is important that we know what God has to say about marriage. Attend counselling classes, read the right books, listen to his word specifically on the role of marriage. It is important to pray together. In today’s world there are two camps: camp it’s cool to be a seen as a Christian and camp Jesus is my actual friend… Know what camp you both belong to.

It sounds simplistic but that is the thing about preparation, it is literally about taking steps on a journey. Life is unpredictable, conflict in marriage will happen but when both parties are prepared it is easier to overcome challenges knowing that God will not give us anything we cannot handle.

Contributed by Tomi
@Taaluko

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DALM | February Elections and Valentine’s Day

What do the february elections and valentine’s day have in common this year? They share the same date. Everyone is talking about the elections this year and for once the usual hula balu over Valentines’s day is drowned out because the elections shares the world famous Valentine’s date. Usually by now eatries and couples are looking forward to the frenzy of dinner reservations to celebrate lover’s day. Lagosians sure know how to go all out on Valentine’s day! See this picture here of lovers in the pool.

This year is different as the questions being asked are not “what are you doing for valentine’s day” rather the questions are “are your voting”? “have you collected your PVC”? “are you in the Country”? “Who are you voting for”? “Is your child home from school”?. I have seen an emerging categorisation of  people that fall into different groups as relates to the upcoming elections.

• Stay and sit put – These are the people who are staying in Nigeria, have stocked up their homes with food and other needs and do not plan to step out of their house that day to vote. They are planning on sitting it out at home and be part of the voting only by watching it unfold on television. Some of those in this group are trying to play it safe as they are not sure if there will be violence or not. As a result they have voted to stay indoors to be safe.
• Stay and be counted - These are the model citizens fulfilling their civic duty. These people have registered, have their PVC card in hand and are ready to join the voting lines to cast their vote. They want to ensure that their vote is counted as we usher in the next set of leaders for Nigeria.
• Travel out - These are the people who are uncertain about the safety of the Country that they are planning to travel out, wait till all is calm before returning to Nigeria. Some people have shutdown their businesses for the month of February because of the fear of the uncertainty of what could happen before and after the elections.
• No PVC – This is the camp that is quite upset, they have gone through the trouble of registering and do not yet have their PVC (trouble because some people did go through a lot before they were able to successfully register). They are hoping that they do indeed get this card before the 14th to be able to cast their vote.
• Happy with no valentines day – This is the group that is happy that they can save their money this Valentine’s day as no one plans to be sitting in a restaurant in the name of Valentine’s day when elections are ongoing.
• Praying Group – This is the group that is praying hard for the future of Nigeria, some people say “Nigeria is on the brink”. There are prayers for free and fair elections, violence free elections and for the best choice of leaders emerging. Everyone really should fall under the praying group as we need to pray across all these areas. A stable healthy Nigeria is a must for all citizens to thrive in. Those that travel will need to return, those that stay need it to be safe, those that vote want their votes to actually be counted in a free and fair elections.

Whatever your stance and your position on the February elections, we should all pray for peace and no violence as we choose our next set of leaders in this Country! “Arise O Compatriots” 

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Parents want everything to go right when it comes to raising their children. Here are some tips from christianpost on how to parent when children make bad choices. Children grow up, become adults and parents are not able to make choices for them. As children grow into adults, parents can only guide and encourage but ultimately cannot fix everything any longer. Below are some tips to help when parents are agonising over what to do and how to help adult children.

1. Ease your guilt.

Every parent makes mistakes. However, as an adult, your son or daughter is now old enough to make their own choices and to take responsibility for them.

2. Understand the burden of getting life back on track is your child’s, not yours.
As parents, this is a truth that’s all-too-easy to forget. Your role now is to encourage your adult child to make better choices and to give him advice if he asks for it. Just remember that he or she is old enough to take responsibility for his or her own life now, so let them be their own person.

3. Let your child suffer the consequences of his choices.
This piece of advice is a difficult one for parents to live out. But the bottom line is if you rescue your child from every problem, he may never feel a reason to live differently. So do not be too quick to save him from his pain. Trust God, because He can use tough consequences to bring about humility, repentance and change.

4. Pray for your son or daughter.
Parents of grown children may not be in a place to directly impact their choices like they could when their child was young; that’s why, in some ways, parenting a grown child requires more faith than before. That’s why prayer is so important. God can still speak to your child’s heart and God can still supernaturally work in his or her life.

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More and more parents today are advised to monitor their children’s body mass index (height-to-weight ratio) as the obesity epidemic among children ages 6-19 is on a scary increase and almost quadruple what it was in the late 1960s. Physical activity will not only help today’s children by preventing them from becoming obese or helping them to lose weight if necessary, it will also teach them healthy habits that can last a lifetime. Here are ACE’s top reasons children should get plenty of exercise:

1. Children who exercise are more likely to keep exercising as adults.
2. Exercise helps chidren achieve and maintain a healthy body weight.
3. Regular physical activity helps build and maintain strong, healthy muscles, bones and joints. 
4. Exercise aids in the development of important interpersonal skills—this is especially true for participation in team sports. 
5. Exercise improves the quantity and quality of sleep. 
6. Research shows that exercise promotes improved school attendance and enhances academic performance.
7. Children who exercise have greater self-esteem and better self-images.
8. Participating in regular physical activity prevents or delays the development of many chronic diseases (e.g., heart disease, diabetes, obesity, hypertension) and promotes health.
9. Children who are active report fewer symptoms of anxiety and depression and a better overall mood.
10. Exercise helps improve motor coordination and enhances the development of various motor performance skills.

How much exercise is enough? Here are some guidelines for different ages 

Children under five

Children under five who can walk unaided should be physically active every day for at least 180 minutes (three hours), spread throughout the day, indoors or outdoors.

If your child is under five, you should encourage them to do:

• light activity and more energetic physical activity. 

Children and young people aged 5 to 18

Children and young people aged 5 to 18 should do at least 60 minutes (one hour) of aerobic activity every day. This should include a mix of:

• moderate-intensity activities: this means your child is working hard enough to raise their heart rate and break a sweat
• vigorous-intensity activities: this means they’re breathing hard and fast, and their heart rate has gone up quite a bit.

As part of your child’s 60 or more minutes, they should also do activities that strengthen their muscles and bones.

For more information visit Nhs.uk

So turn off the television, reduce passive screen time and encourage your children to exercise and break a sweat regularly it is for their health and will lead to healthier lives as adults. 

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This is shocking news and so sad to be reliving the same thing that happened to her mother Whitney recently. This is the news coming in that Bobbi Kristina found unconscious in bathtub.

Since the report yesterday of how Bobbi Kristina Brown was found unresponsive in her bathtub in Roswell, Georgia, many have wondered how she arrived at the same situation as her mother who had died in a filled bathtub after an apparent drug overdose.

Some have wondered if it is that she did not want to face another anniversary of her mother’s death which hit her hard when it happened while she was still a teenager back in 2012. Others have looked to Bobbi Kristina’s husband, Nick Gordon, and wondered if he is to blame. However, a Bobby Brown family source doesn’t want people to get that impression. According to the family member, Nick – who was raised as part of Whitney Houston’s family but never formally adopted – didn’t get along with members of Houston’s family, particularly the late singer’s mother, Cissy Houston. But that doesn’t make him the bad guy. 

The source told PEOPLE magazine;

“He’ll be the bad guy again. Nick knew that a lot of the family weren’t fans of his; he sort of kept her away from some of her family members because he didn’t want [the family] to say bad things about him to [Bobbi Kristina]. It’s not exactly his fault.”

“Everyone had a preconceived notion about him, and it wasn’t always fair. But he didn’t do himself any favors. He was disrespectful a lot of the time, always ‘f’ this and ‘f’ that, using language that Cissy didn’t approve of. To her face. If there’s one thing that Cissy doesn’t stand for, it’s people who swear in front of her.”

“I don’t want to blame Nick for any drug use, because that’s not fair. Bobby was blamed for Whitney’s drug use, and that always bothered him. She was a grown woman who made her own choices.”

“Krissy makes her own choices, too. No one influences her to do anything she doesn’t want to do; she’s stubborn just like both of her parents. Nick may not be the best influence on her, but she makes her own choices.”

“She said, ‘I know how my mother died, and I’ve learned from her mistakes. She seemed very adamant.”

We really hope she pulls through. The truth is that children mirror their lives after their parents unless they make a definite decision not to. She probably still suffering from the pain of loosing her mother the way she did.

Source: romancemeetslife 

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What does LOVE mean to children?

In this month of February; the month of Love as we put it, let’s take a step back to ask ourselves the true meaning of love and what it means to our children.

As LagosMums, we go through the hustle and bustle of everyday life in a society where very few people care about what happens to the next person. It is imperative that we try to figure out if we are instilling the right values and behaviours’ in our children or are we leaving them to grow up and continue the “I don’t care trend” that largely exists in our society today.

What is Love?

The second commandment in the Bible states; “Love your neighbour as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12:31). The Bible also went a step further to say; “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.”(1 Corinthians 13: 4-8).

Love is a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes that ranges from interpersonal affection to pleasure. It can refer to an emotion of a strong attraction and personal attachment. (www.wikipedia.com)

What does Love mean to Children?

A group of professional people posed this same question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds. The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. Find below some of the answers the children gave:

• “When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love.” Rebecca – age 8
• “When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.” Billy – age 4
• “Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.” Terri – age 4
• “If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate.” Nikka – age 6 (we need a few million more Nikka’s on this planet)
• “Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.” Elaine – age 5
• “When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.” (What an image!) Karen – age 7
• “I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.” (Now THIS is love!) Lauren – age 4
• “You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.” Jessica – age 8
• The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbour was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman’s yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbour, the little boy said, “Nothing, I just helped him cry.” Source: Dailygood

Also find below, what love means to some older children:

• “Love is like an avalanche where you have to run for your life.”– John, age 9
• “I think you’re supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isn’t supposed to be so painful.” — Manuel, age 8
• “No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell. That’s why perfume and deodorant are so popular.” — Mae, age 9
• “Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too.” — Greg, age 8
• “Once I’m done with kindergarten, I’m going to find me a wife.” — Tom, age 5
• “I’m in favour of love as long as it doesn’t happen when Dinosaurs is on television.” — Jill, age 6
• “My mother says to look for a man who is kind. That’s what I’ll do. I’ll find somebody who’s kinda tall and handsome.” — Carolyn, age 8
• “It gives me a headache to think about that stuff. I’m just a kid. I don’t need that kind of trouble.” — Kenny, age 7
• “One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills.” — Ava, age 8
• “I’m not rushing into being in love. I’m finding fourth grade hard enough.” — Regina, age 10
• “Most men are brainless, so you might have to try more than once to find a live one.” — Angie, age 10
• “A man and a woman promise to go through sickness and illness and diseases together.” — Marlon, age 10
• “[Being] single is better . . . for the simple reason that I wouldn’t want to change no diapers. Of course, if I did get married, I’d figure something out. I’d just phone my mother and have her come over for some coffee and diaper-changing.” — Kirsten, age 10
• “Love is foolish…but I still might try it sometime.” — Floyd, age 9
• “Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me.” — Dave, age 8. (Source: rinkworks)

There is much more to life than material things and being a good parent doesn’t depend on giving your children everything they want. The most important thing you can do for your child is to love them, and teach them about love. If your children do not learn to love they will lose the ability to feel and show love, which is one of the most precious gifts that God has given us.

Many children as they grow up are afraid to tell their parents they love them, because their parents have never told them that they loved them. Seize the courage and say the words “I love you.” When you say “I love you” out loud and really mean it, it stirs up something deep within, that can change both you and the relationship forever. (Source: lornabyrne)

As a Lagos Mum, let us know; what Love means to your children and how you are teaching them to love…

Contributed by Veev

photo source: techcrunch.com

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Motherhood (I had no idea!)

I don’t know about other mothers but I’ve always wanted to be a mum. I have dreamt of packing lunch boxes for my kids since I was ten. The names I gave my kids when I was young are their second names right now. Second because I married a guy from another tribe; I just let that pass. But honestly, I thought it was just about cute children going to the park, fancy clothes, and children being adorably cute. How hard could that be? If you are a new mother and you are like me, you are in for a shock.

It started with being pregnant. I remember the elation I felt when the doctor confirmed I was pregnant. I was so excited. I was going on a trip with my husband and the first thing I thought about was an opportunity to shop. I could buy cute clothes for my baby. I wanted twins, that way; I could kill two birds with a stone. But the first shock was that I didn’t expect to be so sick; I was so sick that all South African food made me want to puke and I was so ready to board the next plane back to Nigeria. The holiday was no holiday after all. Okay, I agree, after I got back to Nigeria and ate some amala and egusi soup, I felt alright and back to normal. But I was in for another rude shock, I didn’t expect to gain 12Kg and look like a balloon. The plan was to look prettier as my bump grew bigger.

But the rudest shock of all; Labour! My! What was all that? It was so much pain, so painful I can’t even remember it or describe it, all to bring the cutest little boy into the world. When my first child Ojonemi was put into my arms, I remember thinking that he looked so much like his father and I loved him despite the fact that I had looked like a balloon and I had been sick and I had been in labour for ten hours. I loved him.

But, other rude shocks were coming; sleepless nights, a crying baby, breastfeeding, sore nipples! Sometimes I just wondered what I had gotten myself into, other times I wanted my old life back with just my husband and I. But when I looked at his cute face that looked just like His dad, I knew I wanted him, pain and all.

You would think that with all the adjustments I had to make, I would have been more careful, well I wasn’t, lack of planning got me pregnant when Nemi was four months. The first pregnancy had brought me laughter, the second one made me cry. Why? You say? I still had 12kg of unwanted weight, was still dealing with low self-esteem and still trying to get a hang of baby no 1. I was so ashamed; I hid the pregnancy for a while until I could not hide it anymore. But this time, I was more careful, I did not eat for two and guess what labour was forty-five minutes and not ten hours.

I quickly realized that every baby is different and baby Fedo was. While Nemi was easy to put to sleep, Fedo kept us awake for hours on end. While Nemi started sleeping through the night before he was four months, Fedo still ate at night till she was well after 1. While Nemi was born with a bundle of hair, Fedo was born almost bald. While Nemi was calm and wouldn’t try the limits, Fedo was constantly testing our limits and constantly being dragged away from electric sockets.

Life as I knew it had changed. I invite you to join me on my journey through motherhood, to see my transition from wife to mother. Take a walk with me as I share the lessons I learnt along the way and also from other people about being a mother and raising children.

Contributed by Sola Adugah

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Celebrate Valentines Day (and Weekend) with the family. It is valentines day and while there might be plans for dinner out or movie with your other half, don’t forget the children. See below for some ways to celebrate Valentines day with the children.

Movie Night – Get comfortable, bring out blankets, turn down the lights like a movie theatre and watch a family friendly movie classic like Sound of Music, or a Disney movie.

Artwork – Create artwork together. Either make cards for people or create a piece of art for hanging that you can decorate, paint and put some glitter on. Find somewhere in the home to display the artwork.

Eat out – Enjoy take out food together as a treat. Maybe head over to Ice Cream Factory for some ice cream together or warm brownie with a scoop of hokey pokey on top (yummmm).

Dinner at Home – Make a favourite dish and eat at home with the family, add some excitement to the typical family meal with some desert or heart shaped fruits.

Play a game – Play a family game together, turn the day (and the weekend) into an extra loving time as a family. Depending on the childs’ age, pull out a game of Lagos Monopoly or cards or lego, but whatever game it should be something all the family can participate in together.

Appreciate each other – everyone in the family should take the opportunity to talk about love, talk about loving each other and why. Talk, laugh and just enjoy each others company, If you don’t usually have meals as a family do so today and talk to your children uninterrupted (this should be a put-away-the- bb-day)

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I have never been one of those people who much cared about valentine’s day,  but i must admit that being in Lagos has changed my mind! I like the buzz that is in the air in the few days leading up to that day, then all day on Valentine’s day,  I like watching people who have decided to celebrate the day by wearing red, or the ladies walking down the street with their roses and flowers, wanting you to look at them as they flaunt it in your face that “someone out there loves me!”

Inspired by this feeling i really wanted a craft/activity  that allowed K!DS to experience the excitement, anticipation and love that would be in the air in the next coming weeks, and there is no better way to do this than with a Valentines’s Day Treasure Hunt

A Valentine’s Day treasure hunt is a lovely activity that bring that whole family together and kicks of the year with many wonderful years of memories that can be remembered and treasured throughout the year and in the years to come.

This Treasure Hunt is also and excellent opportunity for each member the family to show love and appreciation for one another. As K!DS grow it is import to continue to push them, encourage and strengthen them through positive affirmations by praising and encouraging all their wonderful character qualities instead of just their “talents.” It is also an opportunity for K!DS to do something nice for mum and dad.

Lets get started 

1. View our Valentine’s Treasure Hunt  guide to prepare for the treasure hunt (note: this is a 10 day craftvity that starts on the 4th Feb and end on the 14th of February (Valentine’s Day)
2. At the end of  each day get the K!DS to place their tags on memory tree, for the whole family to see
3. On Valentines eve get the K!DS to create a handmade card which they design and will present to MUM & DAD along with the memory tree  and a lovely cup of Pink Hot Chocolate in bed (as their treat for MUM& DAD) on Valentines day!

“If you never did you should. These things are fun, and fun is good.” Dr Seuss

Visit FUNdamentals K!D Club for more articles, craft ideas and experiments and activities to keep the children learning and playing all day long

Web: www.funville-ng.com

Email: Info@funville-ng.com

FUNdamentals K!DS Club is the #1 place for Children in Nigeria. With Classes and Activities to help K!DS Play, Learn and Grow

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These are some handy Lagos State emergency numbers to have for different Governmental agencies and departments in the case of  issues and questions.

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LagosMums Fashion Looks – Pre-Valentine’s Day Lunch

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The matter of leaving an inheritance is something many parents will desire to do for their children. Inheritance is commonly thought of as assets including money, property, jewelry and perhaps companies. The most recommended way to leave an inheritance is by leaving a will that clearly states what is being shared and how it should be shared. The executor of the will is responsible for making sure all assets in the will are accounted for and transferred to the correct person. 

There are many stories in this part of the world, full of drama and strife, more dramatic than your Nollywood movie. This ranges from family members contesting the will to disagreement of how the inheritance is shared. The size of the family does not seem to matter as we hear of nuclear families who tear themselves apart, while some polygamous homes are able to execute the will with no issues. The disagreements some families face after the passing of a parent is many times shocking and leaves people in disbelief over the embarrassing state of affairs – all over material possessions.

When it comes to the matter of leaving an inheritance it might be worth asking the question “what really is an inheritance”? Is an inheritance only assets and material goods? What about the part of the inheritance that is not quantifiable by the number of zeros or the number of plots.

True inheritance should include a family’s values, the life lessons parents have shared, adult children who are able to stand on their own two feet, a family who is truly god-fearing and love each other. If there is money and assets but strife and discord threatens the very fibre of the family, that is not a successful inheritance. A measure of success should be one where there is harmony, good reputation, godly character, peace and love among the children and family after a parent dies. As the yorubas would say “Let the end of the person who died be good”

Some parents who fear strife after they go are inclined to share their assets before they pass on. If this decision is born out of fear of discord, then the seeds of values and character were not sown during the life of the parent.

The bible does say it is good for a parent to leave an inheritance for their children, but it does not say it is only an inheritance of property and cash. Abraham left an inheritance for Issac, which included having a relationship with God as well as advise on where to get a wife from. Issac himself went on to have an intimate relationship with God, married a good wife and led a successful life.

On the other hand we know that Eli knew God intimately and served the Lord, however all his sons were found wanting in the eyes of God. God judged Eli for the bad behaviour of his sons. Likewise when there is strife and discord in the family after the parents have passed on usually people will ask what happened? Where did the parents go wrong? How did the parents raise the children?

Parents must remember that the matter of leaving an inheritance is not only of wealth, more importantly is an inheritance that includes a legacy of family values, godly character, good deeds, spirit of hard work, love and morals. The family and generations to come is more blessed with an inheritance of wealth and values than merely material goods.

Inheritance can be defined as something from the past that is still important or valuable.  So let us think about inheritance as being about all things of value and not just limited to the assets that one leaves behind.

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I saw the above picture on someone’s Facebook status and it struck me. You would think it was the glaring statement that caught my attention. Nope. It’s the little side note on the bottom left “It all starts with you” that got me thinking about being the best version of you.

Marriage is many things but also not “everything”. Marriage is a union, an intentional arrangement, a celebration of love. It is not a solution, a hideaway, a competition, or a status symbol.

In my opinion and experience the most important person in a marriage is you (well apart from God but that is a personal conviction). Only YOU can know how you feel, what you are thinking, what you want, what you would like to change. Only you will know how your environment and life experiences have shaped you into who you are today. You are extremely unique, the exact set of events can happen to different people and it will have a different impact on each person.

Have you ever noticed when speaking with a group of friends that you might all be saying the same thing but in different ways? Or that you all react to the same situation differently? That is because everyone is wired differently. Some people are more alike than others but no two people are the same, not even twins and definitely not a husband and wife.

So what does this mean? It means the only person you have control over is you. So before looking for Mr or Mrs Right you have to be right with yourself. Oh how we hate dealing with our own “baggage’. It is so much easier to point to the speck in your spouse’s eye rather than to sit and reflect on you. We hide and become “know-it-all’s” about everyone else but never take that same approach with ourselves.

Perhaps then it is no wonder that broken marriages are on the rise.

I hear people saying “but he doesn’t listen” “her personality is too strong” “things would be better if he/she just…” The list goes on. How about we take a minute to flip things around and see things from another angle.

I will start with the first one “he doesn’t listen.” Perhaps rather we should consider if you are talking at the right time? Or using the right tone? what is the motive of the conversation, have you taken the time to sense what mood he is in? Is your mind filled with assumptions and all made up before you even start your conversation?

Imagine if we thought this hard EVERY TIME before we start a conversation? I started doing this and it’s been like a light bulb went off in my head. Half the time I crush the conversation before it even starts (it would not have gone anywhere) and the other times I have clarity on why I am having the conversation in the first place.

Life would be happier if everyone took responsibility for themselves. The more time you spend on and with yourself the faster a better you will emerge.

Change begins with you. If you want a “perfect marriage” your actual goal is to become a perfect person. Once you realize that is not realistic – there is no perfect person! Your focus can shift to being the best version of you, you can be and more importantly being the person God has ordained you to be.

Contributed by Tomilayo
@Taaluko

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Every parent would like to teach their children to grow up to become happy, successful and wealthy adults and a key way for this is to teach your child rich habits. What happens to make some children turn out to be the opposite of this picture? Habits play a big part in how our lives play out.

Is it possible that children become who they are as adults based on the habits that the learnt from their parents? If rich parents have certain habits that they pass on then they are more likely to raise rich children, perhaps poor parents who have counterproductive habits then pass this on and are more likely to raise poor children. Could it be that the rich teach their children rich habits and this is the reason that the wealth seems to recycle itself among a certain group.

Being rich means having lots of possessions and wealth, but it also means “having or supplying a large amount of something that is wanted or needed” definition from merrian. Having rich habits means having habits and taking actions that lead to a successful life, which includes the accumulation of wealth.

According to Rich Habits, our daily habits determine our success or failure in life. The benefits of having Rich Habits accumulate over time and we are rewarded for these good daily habits in the form of valuable relationships, career success, financial success and good health. The detriments of having Poverty Habits also accumulate over time and we are punished for these bad daily habits in the form of damaged relationships, career failure, financial ruin and poor health. The idea that our habits ultimately determine how we turn out suggests that there are good and bad habits.

Daily habits are the cause and financial condition, the effect. A big portion of our daily activities are based on habits. This means that if we are able to train ourselves to have good habits then we can hope for positive outcome and the ensuring effects in our lives. If we are able to train our children from a young age to have good habits then we are setting them up to grow up to be happy, successful and wealthy adults.

There are certain habits that are considered rich habits, these habits are habits that when imbibed from a young age help the children to be rich in all areas of their lives. We all have a mix of good and bad habits but we can train ourselves and focus on making sure we are operating majority of the good habits. In addition when these rich habits are part of our lives then our children can more easily imbibe these habits, children learn more from your doing than your telling.

Some Rich Habits include

• Exercising daily - this habit is a discipline that eliminates overeating and poor health which comes from lack of activity.
• Setting goals – there is a difference between a goal and a wish. A goal is a wish with an attainable and achievable plan to make it a reality.
• Learning – forming the habit of learning is invaluable. Children should learn the habit of being curious to learn, to find solutions and to keep reading.
• Relationships – form the habit of managing relationships as having a healthy relationship and network is a “rich habit”. The people around you are the ones who will encourage you to flourish. Teach children the importance of healthy relationships and not only to use people for what they want to get from them. (Note the way that social media is eroding relationships)
• Moderation – living in moderation is a habit to learn early, this makes it unlikely to engage in any particular activity in excess. Moderation is key for a balanced life. Too much work and no play, or too much play and no work does not work.
• Positive Thinking – Learn the habit of positive thinking, life will always have its ups and downs how you react to situations makes all the difference.
• Financial discipline – Rich people know to pay themselves first and save a minimum of 10-20% of their income and live on the balance. This is why it seems sometimes that their money works for them and continues to grow, they invest and they plan for the future.

Getting rid of a bad habit does not happen with a magic wand, a focus on stopping all bad habits can lead to frustration. Rather focus on what you want to do right and start forming these new habits by doing these things. So pick one bad habit and look for a corresponding “rich habit” then start implementing. For example stop saying you never find the time to exercise, rather decide to start going for a walk down the street or introduce 10 mins of exercise at home, you can also do this as a family.

It takes time to form good habits so crowd out bad habits with rich habits. Rich habits truly make you rich! Children are like sponges and it is highly recommended to introduce positive habits young. For example what eating habits are you teaching your children? Are they on a junk food journey or are you teaching them the invaluable habits of healthy eating, drinking water and eating vegetables and fruits.

As my DIL will say learn to do things in moderation so that you do not have to eliminate things later in your life.

Photo source: profitandpossibilities

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As the saying goes, “you are dressed the way you want to be addressed”.  The first impression you make in any setting, matters a lot.  Someone once said, “Your clothing speaks long before you do.”  What that means is that whether you say a word or not, what you are wearing is talking.  Your wardrobe communicates trust, wisdom, status, and wealth. It reveals how conservative you are, or how much of a risk taker you are. Whether you are making first impressions, building relationships, or enjoying the relationships you’ve already built, your clothing is always communicating.

My dear Lagos Mums, we have beautiful children, sisters and brothers or we hope to have; what are our clothes and those of our children saying about us? Below is an excerpt from an article I came across about a young girl who believes the 1950’s was the era of ladies and not what we have today.

Although victory rolls and ankle length skirts may seem a little dated to many women in their twenties, for one it is a way of life. Holly Foster, 22, prides herself on her lady-like attire, adopting the style of women in 1950s, which has recently seen her crowned Miss Vintage UK. However, her floral prints and pearls are more than just a style statement as Holly says dressing this way – and ‘not like Miley Cyrus’ – is the only way to demand real respect from men. Source DailyMail

Miley Cyrus

Holly Foster

Holly, from Welling, Kent, even suggests that women who dress in a more revealing manner could encourage unwanted attention. She said; ‘Girls my age will go out on the town in skimpy – largely unflattering – clothing and they are surprised when they are not treated with respect. ‘If you dress like a lady you will be treated like a lady.’

Holly added that she had witnessed it in action when she has been on nights out with friends.  ‘I go to nightclubs like other girls my age and when I do I’m always struck by the same thing.’You walk into a room all the guys are looking at you, just up and down like you’re a piece of meat.’ ‘Men I meet tell me I look attractive because I leave a little something to the imagination…’

An excerpt from the book: More Than A Hero: Muhammad Ali’s Life Lessons Through His Daughter’s Eyes: shares that once when Muhammad Ali’s daughters arrived at his home wearing clothes that were quite revealing. Ali apparently took a good look at them, then sat his daughter down on his lap and said something she will never forget.

He looked me straight in the eyes and said, “Hana, everything that God made valuable in the world is covered and hard to get to. Where do you find diamonds? Deep down in the ground, covered and protected. Where do you find pearls? Deep down at the bottom of the ocean, covered up and protected in a beautiful shell. Where do you find gold? Way down in the mine, covered over with layers and layers of rock. You’ve got to work hard to get to them.” He looked at me with serious eyes. “Your body is sacred. You’re far more precious than diamonds and pearls, and you should be covered too.”  Source Unilag.edu

• Who would you rather dress like; Miley Cyrus or Holly Foster?

• Would you give your daughters, sisters, brothers and friends the same advice Muhammad Ali gave his daughters “Your body is sacred. You’re far more precious than diamonds and pearls, and you should be covered too?”

• Would you have them ask themselves each day what their clothes are saying about them? Would you ask yourself, what your clothes are saying about you?

If you can answer these questions, then you are well on your way to raising decent, well grounded and confident children who would not be carried away by pop culture and fashion trends that are not up to par in the decency radar. You would have raised children who will know exactly what their clothes say about them each time they leave the house.

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Introducing your baby to solid foods is exciting but it can be difficult to know exactly how and when to get started.

Your baby should be four months of age at the very least – before this age the immature digestive system will find it difficult to cope with solid food. Most medical professionals, however, will advise waiting until your baby is at least six months of age, to reduce the risk of food allergies.

Your baby’s age is not the only consideration and there are other factors to take into account when determining whether or not the time is right for baby’s first foods.

Look for signs of readiness in your baby – does he watch you with interest when you eat, following the progress of your food from plate to mouth? This increased interest in solid food can indicate that he’s ready to try it for himself.

Does your baby seem dissatisfied after his usual milk feeds, or is he waking at night after previously sleeping through? Although these may be signs of an increase in his appetite, they can also be triggered by discomfort from teething. It is important to try to establish whether or not teething is the cause, to avoid introducing solid foods before your baby really needs them.

Your baby should have good head control and be able to sit well, as this makes swallowing easier. Younger babies may not be able to sit unsupported, however, so it is very important to provide the appropriate support if this is the case.

The decision to introduce solid foods to your baby must ultimately be made by you and your child’s doctor. You may feel pressured by other people – particularly the older generation – to give solid foods to your baby earlier than medical advice recommends. It is important to remember that a great deal of research has been carried out in order to provide this advice and such information simply wasn’t available in the past.

So what is the best first food for baby?

Baby rice, an easily digestible, single grain cereal, is the ideal food to start with. It can be mixed with warmed breastmilk or formula, so its taste will be familiar to your baby. Initially, you can mix it to a fairly runny consistency that your baby will find easy to cope with, thickening the texture slightly with each subsequent feed. (Baby rice cereal can also be made at home by cooking and mashing rice with milk).

About a tablespoon of baby rice is the perfect amount to start with. Try giving this first solid feed around lunch time, but take the edge off your baby’s appetite by giving him some of his usual milk feed before the baby rice. If he is too hungry, he will be frustrated and distressed.

He will respond well to supportive gestures and smiles, so stay relaxed and don’t worry if he pushes the food back out of his mouth! Most babies do this instinctively at first and this “tongue-thrust” reflex will subside as he becomes accustomed to the new and unusual textures he is experiencing.

If he does not seem interested, simply take the food away and try again the next day, or a few days later. You should not try to force him to eat, as this is traumatic for him and will only make things more difficult. After all, there is no rush – at this stage, breastmilk or formula is meeting all of his nutritional needs.

Once your baby is comfortably enjoying baby rice, then try introducing pureed, fresh vegetables. It is worth noting that some babies do not like baby rice at all and begin by eating vegetables straight away.

Introduce only one new vegetable at a time, leaving four days between each new food. This will help you identify any foods that cause an allergic reaction or trigger digestive problems in your baby.

Some good vegetables to introduce as baby’s first foods are spinach, sweet potato, carrots, white potatoes. These can be boiled or steamed, then pureed. Alternatively, sweet potatoes can be baked in their skins, then the soft flesh scooped out, ready to serve – instant, healthy baby food!

You can try combining different vegetables for some delicious new flavours – carrots and spinach. The possibilities are endless! Introduce eac new food one at a time to be sure you are able to note any reactions.

Once your baby is enjoying vegetables, you can add fruits to the menu. Good choices include pureed banana, avocado and cooked, pureed apples and pears. Citrus fruits should be avoided for the first year, as they can trigger allergic reactions.

For something really different, try combining fruits and vegetables, such as apples with carrots, or bananas with sweet potato, apple with mashed rice for some unusual but tempting new flavours.

Follow your baby’s lead and increase the amount and frequency of his meals as his appetite dictates. Always watch carefully for any signs of allergic reactions and discuss any concerns with a medical professional.

Above all, have fun introducing baby’s first foods – by selecting and preparing these fresh and wholesome ingredients, you are getting him off to a wonderfully healthy start.

Slowly you can add to the growing menu chicken that is cooked and the broth also used to flavor food.

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According to a recent article in The NYTimes, Girls as young as 7 are starting puberty. There are some reasons why girls are starting puberty earlier due to ongoing research. Some of the reasons young girls are increasingly starting puberty before ages 10 or 11 include:

• Overweight -  Overweight girls are more susceptible to early puberty. Excess body fat serves as an additional source of estrogen and the result is earlier breasts.
• Sugar - research shows that girls who drink more sodas are also more likely to reach puberty early, regardless of whether they were overweight.
• Family stress – Strong evidence reveals that emotional stress in a girl’s family can jump-start puberty earlier. A girl who grows up without her biological father is twice as likely to get her period before age 12 compared with a girl reared with her father in the home.
• Chemicals – Endocrine-disrupting chemicals are also a concern because they can mimic hormones, like estrogen, that are the key players in a girl’s body during puberty. Many chemicals, including those in fire retardants and plastics, disrupt reproductive development in animals; however, more research is needed on humans. Chemical exposures may also disrupt girls’ puberty, but less is known in this area.

While there are many likely reasons for the start of puberty, there are some ways to protect against early puberty.

• Breast-feeding early in life appears to help. What’s more, when a mother maintains a healthy weight before and during pregnancy, her daughter is less likely to get her period early. Work by our team also shows that consuming soy foods may delay puberty.
• To buffer against stress, parents should prioritize setting aside time to engage with their daughters and bond emotionally.
• We also need to continue to improve our daily menus and enhance the quality of school lunch programs. Adults need to demonstrate healthy habits that support our own ideal weights and reduce stress levels.

Puberty is unlikely to be triggered by a single factor. It may be a combination of exposures that do real damage, as well as the timing of the exposure during development.

On a final sense a good rule of thumb is if we are not sure whether something is safe, then we should not expose our children to it in general and not only as relates to puberty.

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