Parent Education has its benefits and is helpful to parents who go through it. Most people will get swimming lessons and will go to school to get an education. However with parenting it just happens to you. You give birth and then you figure it out along the way how to raise the child.

Parent education ultimately strengthens families by equipping parents on their parenting journey to be able to handle the challenges that come with different stages. There is no formal training and parents can sometimes feel isolated as they figure it out all by themselves. Benefits of parent education include:

• Guidance along the parenting journey
• Learning from expereince of other parents who have gone through or are going through similar challenges
• Benefit of another perspective as talking and sharing in a supportive environment will lead to other ideas of dealing with your family and parenting questions
• increased knowledge of child development, improvement in parent-child communication.
• You can get the affirmation you need that you’re making appropriate decisions regarding your child 
• Ability to identify certain triggers and areas of concern easily, for example parent education can make it clear what to look for in youth to identify substance abuse, evidence of abuse or depression

Even is parenting feels like it should be natural and innate, every parents, whether you are struggling or cruising along nicely can always benefit from meeting with other like minded parents or experts to sharpen and strengthen your parenting skills. As described aptly from eacourier, Parenting is a difficult, joyous and rewarding endeavour, but no one can do it perfectly.

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Children back in school with the sniffles and nursing a cold, there are some natural remedies for a cold. Below are some helpful tips to take care of that cold -

Cold Remedy #1: Drink plenty of fluids to help break up your congestion. Drinking water or juice will prevent dehydration and keep your throat moist. You should drink at least 8 to 10 eight-ounce glasses of water daily. Include fluids such as water, fresh orange juice, herbal teas, hot water with honey and lemon, fruit drinks, or ginger ale. Some nice hot goat peppersoup might help too! (Avoid cola, coffee, and other drinks with caffeine because it acts like a diuretic and may dehydrate you.)

Cold Remedy #2: Inhale steam to ease your congestion and drippy nose. Hold your head over a pot of boiling water and breathe through your nose. Be careful it is not too hot and burns your nose. For additional effectiveness drop some Vicks Vapor Rub or Olbas Oil into the water. This rememdy works with kids as well, to modify it for children you can dip a towel into the bowl of boiling water, squeeze out the excess water and use it to mop their chests and head. I warn you though they will kick and scream but will feel soo much better afterwards.

Cold Remedy #3: Blow your nose often, but do it the proper way. It’s important to blow your nose regularly when you have a cold rather than sniffling mucus back into your head. But when you blow hard, pressure can carry germ-carrying phlegm back into your ear passages, causing earache. The best way to blow your nose is to press a finger over one nostril while you blow gently to clear the other.

Cold Remedy #4: Use saline nasal sprays or make your own salt water rinse to irrigate your nose. Salt-water rinsing helps break nasal congestion while also removing virus particles and bacteria from your nose. Here’s a popular recipe:

Mix 1/4 teaspoon salt and 1/4 teaspoon baking soda in 8 ounces of warm water. Fill a bulb syringe with this mixture, lean your head over a basin, and using the bulb syringe, gently squirt the salt water into your nose. Hold one nostril closed by applying light finger pressure while squirting the salt mixture into the other nostril. Let it drain. Repeat two to three times, and then treat the other nostril.

Cold Remedy #5: Stay warm and rested. Staying warm and resting when you first come down with a cold or the flu helps your body direct its energy toward the immune battle. This battle taxes the body. So give it a little help by lying down under a blanket to stay warm if necessary.

Cold Remedy #6: Gargle with warm salt water. Gargling can moisten a sore or scratchy throat and bring temporary relief. Try a half teaspoon of salt dissolved in 8 ounces of warm water four times daily. Or use a thick, viscous gargle made with honey, popular in folk medicine. Steep one tablespoon of lemon juice in two cups of hot water; mix with one teaspoon of honey. Let the mixture cool to room temperature before gargling.

Cold Remedy #7: Take a steamy shower. Steamy showers moisturize your nasal passages and relax you. If you’re dizzy from the flu, run a steamy shower while you sit on a chair nearby and take a sponge bath.

Cold Remedy #8: Try a small dab of mentholated balm under your nose to help open breathing passages and help restore the irritated skin at the base of the nose. Menthol, eucalyptus all have mild numbing ingredients that may help relieve the pain of a nose rubbed raw.

Cold Remedy #9: Sleep with an extra pillow under your head. This will help relieve congested nasal passages. If the angle is too awkward, try placing the pillows between the mattress and the box springs to create a more gradual slope.

Cold Remedy #10: Take lots and lots of vitamin C.

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Parenting Debate: Is Rihanna too Raunchy for Children

Mel C (former Spice Girls) is reported to have recently banned her daughter Scarlett from watching Rihanna videos. Apparently she said that female artists should ‘have more dignity’ and stop flaunting their flesh and featuring explicit content in their music videos and live performances.

“It’s vulgar and narcissistic and I worry about how it affects girls,” she said, adding that the Spice Girls weren’t interested in ‘pleasing men’.

What side are you on? Do you limit your child from watching and enjoying certain artists, like Rihanna’s music or do you leave your child to watch and listen what he or she wants?

In excerpts from the independent two mothers weigh in on their views.

Against: Yvonne Hogan, mother of one says 

There is something very dark and insidious about the type of sexuality that is permeating popular culture today. It is not extrovert, playful, cheeky and confident, a la Spice Girls. Rather it is humiliating and submissive and demeaning.

Depressing to see lovely, young, talented, hard- working women, barely out of their teens emulating porn stars, naively playing out the sad fantasies of the cynical middle-aged men who profit from exploiting them and their talents, and believing themselves to be in control.

Every year, the videos and performances get more and more explicit, more pornographic. And as parents, I believe we have to speak out. So I join Mel C in saying that enough is enough. It’s time that female entertainers took their dignity back.

For: Gillian Fitzpatrick

She reports that her daughter may dance to whatever music she likes.

Rather than limit what children watch or not she says let’s embrace hands-on parenting that involves supervised access to electronic devices. Let’s champion reasonable discussion with our children about what is acceptable. Let’s embrace calm words of warning that aim to educate.

What are your thoughts? How should children be protected. There is a lot of sexuality everywhere and the question remains how to protect children appropriately.

photo: whenintime

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Everywhere you turn there is something going on that shocks you and you might wonder what to do when the world seems to be shaking. It can be violence, terrorism, immorality, plagues, wickedness, sickness and so many other things. There is the ongoing news report of Boko Haram attacks, the Girls are still not back, the breakout of Ebola and other news that are not encouraging.

In church the other day, PT mentioned some stories I can only refer to as sickness – the height of sickness. These are stories that show a different level of a world that seems to be shaking.

If true (I say “if” because I can’t fathom this being real), one mother has reportedly announced that she is in love with her daughter and waited for the daughter to reach the age of consent so that they can carry on their relationship freely. The daughter claims to have learnt to separate mum from lover! They claim to be coming out to help other people who need to express themselves – sickness!

Second story was of twin boys who report being homosexuals, their concern was not about how to break the news to their parents. Their parents are already aware and are accepting of their sexual preference. Their big concern was how to tell their parents that they are each others lovers! – sickness

Third he mentioned was the one where a woman was in love with her dog saying that a dog is more faithful than a man!!

The point is the world seems to be shaking, there seems to be darkness in some shape or form. These are various sorts of storms that are raging and threatening to take over the world as we know (or knew) it. Abnormal things seems to be becoming less shocking and almost normal?

What we have is that Gods word never changes, God does not follow seasons or trends. What God said was not okay before is still not okay today. It is assuring to know that there is something that stays the same – Gods word! With Gods word you do not have to check the trend-o-meter to see if what God said is trending or in vogue or not. Gods word is assuring and stays the same.

As PT said God has pre-planned us for the darkness that seems to cover the land with something always threatening to take over and consume life and morality as we know it. The bible has said that the earth will groan and that God’s people will be the light shining in the midst of darkness.

The word says that there will be storms, the storms reveal which house is built on sand and which on rock – this is how God’s people will be revealed. Are you on slippery slope and taken over by a storm or are you on solid land and can stand firm no matter the storm or trend.

If there is no exam there can be no passing! The same way if there is no test there is no way to know who is for God or not.
God expects his people to be men and women of integrity, to have tenacity of character and to be creative. Creative because when you are in this world but not of this world, you need spiritual creativity to be able to navigate the world that we live in while still holding on firm to God’s word.

God has not left us without a roadmap or without guidance. God did say that there will be shaking in the earth, things and thoughts will shake, people and belief systems will shake, but what will remain are the things of the kingdom.

So this is what we should do when we look around and there are so many things that seem to be shaking, or you have children who ask you about what seems to be trending and want to know your view of what is true or not. Don’t waiver.

The only answer we have is God’s word and this does not ever change – to stay grounded we must know God’s word, meditate on God’s word and be able to stand unshaken when the storms rage.

photo source: ligonier.org

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There are a lot of important things to remember about buying baby clothes for your own baby or buying baby clothes for someone else’s baby. If you want them to keep the baby clothes you buy put some thought into choosing the baby clothes you buy.

Buttons, Bows, Snaps, and other decorative items on baby clothes can be uncomfortable for the baby. Remember to check out the location of all decorative items. Think about how the baby will be in the article of clothing and how the accessories may be bothersome or even harmful.

The worst thing to forget when buying baby clothes is the fact that the parent will have to actually put these baby clothes on the baby and take them off again. Be sure the baby clothing has easy access for diaper changing, clothing changes, etc. Usually snap crotches are great for ease of diaper changes. Neckline may be stretchy or have a snap or two to widen the opening around your baby’s head.

Gifts from everyone are usually given as newborn or small sizes and you don’t know how quickly the baby will grow or outgrow baby clothes. Buy baby clothes one size too large and you can’t go wrong.

Practical Tips on Baby Clothing

Perhaps the biggest problem with baby clothes is that they don’t last.  Not because they wear out, but because your baby quickly out grows them.

It’s important to plan your baby clothes shopping around the growth of your baby.  If you don’t, you could be wasting money.

Keep in mind these tips while you plan your baby clothes shopping:

1. Wear a Larger Size

People say babies grow fast, and they’re right about that.  You’ll be wasting money if you buy perfect fitting clothes because they’ll soon be too small.  Buying a larger size will extend the amount of time your baby can wear them.

2. Consider the Weather

Stop and think for a moment about clothes labels that state size in terms of a baby’s age, such as 12 or 18 months.  Then ask this question: “When my baby is X months old, what will the weather or temperature be like?”  Get the answer to this question correct and you’ll buy clothes that not only fit, but also will be appropriate for the season. For us in warm parts of the world like in Lagos it is really about rainy or dry season but this might be worth keeping in mind.

3. Find Easy To Put On Outfits

Sometimes you’ll struggle to dress your baby into an outfit you want him to wear.  Outfits that come in one piece, open in the front, have zippers, or snap buttons should be easier to deal with.

4. Have Enough for Emergencies

Food can drop on your baby’s clothes while you’re feeding him.  If your baby becomes sick, he might throw-up on his outfit.  When a messy accident occurs, you’ll need a clean set of clothes ready for your baby to wear.

5. Save on Sales

You can save a bundle at the clearance racks.  Almost every type of store has these.  In addition, if you wait for a big sale you can save even more.  Some stores will also markdown the clearance item further at the cash register.

6. Accept Hand Me Downs

Your family and friends may want to give you their children’s baby clothes.  They may have new clothes that their baby didn’t have a chance to wear.  If you decide to accept what they are willing to give, you’ll save yourself some money.

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This is an encouraging story of how a disappointment can lead to other opportunities. The story is about a jobless man applied for the position of  ‘office boy’ at Microsoft. 

The HR manager interviewed him, then gave him a test: clean the floor. The man passed the test with flying colors.

“You are hired,” HR manager informed the applicant, “give me your e-mail address, and I’ll send you the application for employment, as well as the date you should report for work.

The man replied ” I don’t have a computer, or an email!”

“I’m sorry,” said the HR manager. “If you don’t have an email, that means you do not exist. And we cannot hire persons who do not exist.”

The man was very disappointed. He didn’t know what to do. He only had $10 with him. Once that is spent, he won’t have any money to buy any food.

He went to the supermarket and bought a crate of tomatoes with his $10. He went from door to door and sold the tomatoes in less than two hours. He doubled his money.

He repeated the operation three times, and returned home with $60. He realized that he can survive
this way. He started to go everyday earlier, and return late.

He doubled or tripled his money every day. Soon, he bought a cart, then a truck. In a very short time, he had his own fleet of delivery vehicles.

Five years later, the man became one of the biggest food retailers in the U. S. He started to plan his family’s future, and decided to have a life insurance.

He called an insurance broker, and chose a protection plan.

At the end of the conversation, the broker asked him for his email address.

The man replied: ‘ I don’t have an email.’

The broker was dumbfounded. “You don’t have an email, and yet have succeeded in building an empire. Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an email?,” he exclaimed.

The man thought for a while, and replied, “an office boy at Microsoft!”

Life is dependent on how you react to what happens to you, it can either limit you or you find the way to overcome!

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LagosMums Fashion Looks

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LagosMums Parenting and Networking Event is a platform to meet and discuss parenting in the 21st Century. An opportunity to share with other mums and parents on the parenting journey, learn from experts, ask your parenting questions and share your parenting joys and challenges in a relaxed and encouraging environment.

The event is free to attend, registration is necessary to secure your spot 

Date: 22nd November 2014

Time: 9 – 9.30am registration and coffee. 10 am – 1 pm is the panel and discussion.

Venue: The WheatBaker Hotel, Ikoyi.

for further details do please email contactus@lagosmums.com

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Ever wondered about how to spy on your nanny? Watch video below

Ariyike Akinbobola is an award winning Nigerian Media Personality/ Humanitarian. She is a Lawyer turned TV Presenter and she also has her writing segment ”Ariyike writes” on www.bellanaija.com.

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LagosMums Fashion Looks

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COKE & MENTOS Volcano

One of the most popular experiments is the Coke and Mentos Geyser. This experiment is a lot of fun and sure to amaze your friends and family (assuming you do it outside rather than in the living room)

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We are all used to hearing about having a vision for your business, for your life and for your career. What is your parenting vision? This is not a topic that is ever really discussed  as one of the areas that you need to prepare for, think about and actively chart a plan for. Most parents just get on with it and figure it out along the way.

When we parent with only short-term goals in mind, it’s easy to lose sight of our long-term goals of raising happy, healthy, confident children. Having a vision helps with ensuring what you are working towards, so it should be with your children. 

Here are some questions to ask yourself as a parent

1. What are the beliefs and traits you would like your child to develop as an adult?

To have this plan you need to have done an assessment of what your beliefs and values are as a parent. You can only teach what you know or what you have consciously thought about. Children who are respectful, creative, confident, empathetic, hard-working, god fearing….the list can go on and on. 

2. Which of these beliefs and traits do you confirm in your own behavior? 

This is the really big and honest question. Remember, children learn more by observing you than by all the lectures and talks of what they should be doing. So go ahead and look at that list you just made, and highlight the beliefs you don’t display. Do they see you scream at people who upset you? this is not showing them respect is important. 

3.  Are you controlling or approachable?

Whatever your personality whether you are approachable or controlling is important in raising your children.  Constantly telling your child what to do, how to do it without encouraging an environment of communication can be counter productive. Be open, approachable and loving. Focus on ‘why’ and ‘how’ to ensure that your children understands what you expect from them. 

4. When your kids look back at you as a parent, will they remember you as honest or dishonest?

Your child’s entire worldview is based on their view of you as their parents. Don’t lie, or make up stories that they will know were lies when they are older. If they know that everything you do and say is honest and consistent, they will learn to trust everything else you have said, about life and beliefs. Children (as adults) sometimes are caught trying to rationalize what their parents taught them with what is reality when they become adults. It should not be shockingly different.

Determine the values you expect your child to have and the vision you have as parent – literally fast forward and imagine how you would like your child to be as an adult then walk backwards to ensure you create an enabling environment for the child to achieve that.

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The saying “Lord teach us to number our days” and “It is not how long but how well” are phrases we are all sharing and remembering at this time along with the display picture quote from Myles Munroe “The greatest tragedy in life is not death, but a life without purpose” 

It is with sadness the world received the news of the tragic loss of Dr Myles Munroe, his wife Ruth and other passengers on the plane that was headed to Grand Bahama for Dr. Munroe’s 2014 Global Leadership Forum. 

I remember hearing him as he visited our church a couple of times and he was always a great inspiration and taught Kingdom principles in a powerful and practical way.

It is very sad to learn of this loss and the blow it must be to his family who lost multiple members of their family and their church at the same time. We can’t but thank God for his life and all the impact that he made along with his wife, team and church while he was alive. His works live on.

It is just a reminder of how fragile is and that we do not know when and how. We pray that we live the life we have been given well to Gods glory, we will not leave this earth one day earlier than God has planned.

Dr. Munroe died living out his purpose in life; spreading the gospel of Christ.

Rest in Peace!

Related articles across the web

• Jet crash in Bahamas kills 9

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How well do you know your own child? Why is it important to know your child’s personality? Your child possesses a combination of traits, some which you understand and can deal with easily and some that might take more energy to manage. Either way your child has his or her own personality traits. 

Children might show a mix of traits – sometimes being very adventurous and bold and other times careful and shy. Understanding your child’s personality traits starts with knowing what characterises your child more often.  Would you say he is mostly adventurous or mostly cautious?

An overly energetic and adventurous child might keep his parents on their toes more often but a child who is too timid and shy might also cause a parent some concern at their ability to cope with others and get on with the challenges of life.

How a child uses his inborn traits — whether those will be strengthened or subdued — will be influenced throughout his childhood by three or four factors:

1. Relationships. Your relationship with your child will have a greater impact on him than that of any other person, so do all you can to nurture him. Also seek to help him develop mutually uplifting relations with siblings, grandparents, friends, uncles, aunts and others.
2. The way he is educated. Be involved in your child’s education to ensure that your child’s school and classroom is suited to him. It is important to have conversations with your child’s teacher to be sure that the teacher recognises your child’s personality traits and builds up strengths while encouraging him to overcome weaknesses.
3. The environment in which he lives. Make sure your household provides your child a rich environment and this is not referring to the material comfort. Two children with similar personalities — one of whom isn’t appreciated or encouraged and another who is supported while he explores his interests and passions — will respond differently to life.
4. Trauma in early childhood.  Trauma can make it difficult to separate the innate character traits from those that have evolved out of fear of punishment.  In a healthy home, a child’s strongest traits generally will follow him from infancy through adulthood.

Effects of your child’s personality traits will impact

• how he relates to other people,
• how he deals with problems,
• how he organises his thoughts and carries out tasks, and
• what interests and motivates him.

In other words, becoming familiar with your child’s personality will go a long way toward helping you understand why your child acts the way she does. At the same time, the more intimately you get to know a child, the more you will find that he cannot be stereotyped and summed up by just one personality type. Yet children often reveal strengths and weaknesses in clusters that seem familiar. And familiarity can breed greater understanding.

Spend time getting to understand and know your child’s personality traits so that it is easier to guide the child to strengthen their weaknesses and harness their strength.

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Ariyike Akinbobola is an award winning Nigerian Media Personality/ Humanitarian. She is a Lawyer turned TV Presenter and she also has her writing segment ”Ariyike writes” on www.bellanaija.com.

Ariyike Weekly
Email address: ariyikeweekly@gmail.com
Twitter and Instagram: @LadyAriyike
Youtube: Ariyike Weekly

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Mummy why are you scary? Was the question my four year old asked me. I was like sorry? what did you say? He said yes you are scary..and he proceeded to emphasise the scary this time and continued by pointing out that I was always snapping. His older sister took this as an invitation to join the conversation and she proceeded to say yes “Mummy calm down”

Now I know I could never have spoken to my parents like this and gotten away with it. So many things were going on in my head at that very moment…Should I smack them for saying this? Should I punish them for speaking to me this way? But then a little voice just said they just called you scary..if you do any of these things you have just confirmed that you are scary.

So i did the next thing that came to my mind and that was to give myself a time out – I asked them to excuse me and i took myself upstairs to my room, sat down and took a deep breath.

Being scary was definitely not something I wanted to be known for. Firm, disciplinarian, loving and so many other adjectives but definitely not scary. Monsters are scary!

This really bothered me for a little while and I wondered if they had a point, so I watched it and realised that it is easy from their point of view why I might appear scary. After a long day at work or out on the streets of Lagos I am more prone to snap as I tackle part two of my day. Already tired and cranky I might snap when they take a little longer on homework than they should, snap when trying to respond to a ping, a tweet, whatsapp or email while they are trying to get my attention at that very same time. Trying to get them to go to bed so I can settle on the laptop to do some “work” and they decide to say goodnight a million times – snap.

So I have decided to make some changes because i definitely do not want to be seen as a scary mum! I am trying to balance my day better and to enjoy the time I am spending with the children. When I am at a meeting I wouldn’t start chatting with my children on the phone, so same thing when I am with the children and we are spending time together that is not the time for me to be multi-tasking by doing a million things.

They haven’t said I am scary again in awhile and I am spending more time with them in a deliberate and uninterrupted manner. After all they didn’t ask that I am busy doing a million things at the same time when all they want is time with their mum.

I thank them for that comment in hindsight because it has made me review how I am responding to them and enabled me to see myself from their eyes.

What have your children said to you that has made you give yourself a “time out”

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Mums do you have a baby between 0 and 18 months?

Then you might be interested in this offer to test some new products and get to give your feedback! Fill the form below to get the products delivered to your doorstep.

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Identifying your child’s personality type might help you with some sense of general steps on how to deal with your child’s unique traits. There are no cookie cutters formulas but there are some general trends and traits that you can determine. Nearly twenty-five hundred years ago Hippocrates laid the foundation for understanding personality with four types and their commonly recognised characteristics.

They are:

• Cholerics are adventurous, determined, outspoken, competitive, strong-willed. Choleric people are extroverted and proud. They tend to be leaders and seek to be in control of situations, to be on top and to be the best. They tend to be defiant of authority and try to assert themselves. They tend to speak their minds without thinking much about who they affect with their words. They tend to tend towards leadership roles, such as managers, politicians, captains, team leaders, and so on. 

• Sanguines are playful, sociable, talkative, lively, imaginative. Sanguine people are boisterous, bubbly, chatty, openly emotional, social extroverts.They make friends quickly and are also generally easy going, charismatic and easy to get along with. They tend to be your entertainers, singers and dancers.

• Melancholy people are detailed, orderly, persistent, respectful, deep. Melancholy people are perfectionists and are idealists who wish for things to be a certain way. They think and plan before they act; they are not the types who will resort to rash, impulsive behaviour. They tend to be your scientists, analysts, programmers, logicians, and so on.

• Phlegmatics are thoughtful, controlled, adaptable, attentive, diplomatic. Phlegmatic people are usually eager to please, and quick to give in to others rather than asserting their own desires. They are well-behaved and avoid conflict, they seek peace. They are extremely trustworthy; if they make a promise, it’s very likely that they will keep it, they are natural followers and follow rules happily. They tend to be the ones that make things work and are the stable, trustworthy colleagues at work. 

Generally if your child is a sanquine, then he or she is primarily interested in being with other people and having fun. If your child is a melancholy he or she probably most likely wants to get things just right. If your child is a phlegmatic he or she cares deeply about others’ feelings. If your child is a choleric he or she values adventure and being the leader.

These are not absolute and people tend to have more than one character trait.

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Kids Art - Salt Water Painting

Who knew painting with salt! could produce such beautiful artworks the kids and you will love

What You Need

• Water colour Paint
• Construction Paper
• Water
• Paintbrush
• Salt

Instructions

1. Start by using a thick paintbrush to thoroughly wet a piece of paper or thin card.
2. While it’s still wet, take some light blue water colour and wash it over the wet paper
3. Next, splash in some strong abstract blobs of colour, about half way down the paper.
4. Use another watery colour and then another. These blotches will eventually be exotic coral on a tropical sea bed!
5. Next, add vivid blue and greens to the bottom of the picture to create the sea bed.
6. While the paints are still wet, gently sprinkle on some ordinary table salt.
7. Sprinkle it randomly, be careful not to put too much on.
8. When the paint has dried, gently shake the salt off.
9. You’ll see that where the salt settled, it has reacted with the paint and given it a fantastic tropical coral-like effect!

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According to Forbes, a survey of salaries complied by Phil Gardner from Michigan State University shows degrees commanding the highest salaries are engineering degrees; in this order electrical, computer and then mechanical engineering. The average starting salaries are $57,000, $56,600 and $56,000 respectively. 

He explains that students with engineering majors are highly technical and deeply trained so they have a more immediate value to employers as they can apply their knowledge quickly to the workplace and so can command a higher salary.

The next highest paid after the engineering degrees are software design and computer programming. At the bottom of the salary ladder are Advertising, social work and psychology jobs averaging salaries below $37,000. 

See table below for the list of degrees and their average starting salaries

Source: Forbes

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